Coates & Frey, Attorneys at Law, LLLC
Phone: (808) 524-4854

Holiday travel with your kids as a single parent

In a few weeks, we'll be deep in the winter holiday season. For many parents of young children that means one thing: Lots of traveling so that you can visit grandparents and other relatives. If this is your first year doing it alone after your divorce or separation, here are some survival tips:

1. Control expectations.

Despite the fact that you no longer all live together, don't be surprised if your kids still expect your ex to be with them on your holiday trip. It may not have sunk in that Mom or Dad won't be there at all the "family" functions that are important to them.

Discuss the issue early with the kids so that they have time to process their feelings before they're on the road. That can minimize the chances that they'll act out on the trip because of their distress.

2. Accept your limitations.

You also need to manage your expectations for the holiday trips. Without a partner helping you with the kids, you probably can't do as much as you've done before. Pick and choose the activities you'll participate in advance based on what you can realistically handle on your own.

3. Enlist help from others.

The odds are good that someone at your destination would be delighted to take the kids for a few hours while you wrap gifts or bake. It isn't a sign of weakness to ask for some help with the kids while you're visiting for the holidays.

Most divorced parents feel the impact of their divorce the most keenly during the first year, especially when the holidays roll around. Sometimes, the emotional reaction people have leads to custody disputes. If you need help with a custody issue, talk to an attorney today.

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