Coates & Frey, Attorneys at Law, LLLC
Phone: (808) 524-4854

Why are you putting off your divorce?

If you're unhappily married, you probably have been thinking about divorce for quite a while. You may even have started to imagine what life would be like if your spouse was no longer around.

So, why haven't you taken the next step? Why haven't you talked to your spouse about a divorce or contacted an attorney? If you're like most people, you're delaying the inevitable because of one of the following reasons:

1. Fear

It's scary to change your whole life around, especially if you've been married for a while. Even if you only recently got married, however, you may have had a whole vision of your future with your spouse. It can be terrifying to think of "rewriting" that vision and finding your own way. Many people are also afraid of being alone.

However, the reality is that, if you're unhappy, you've already lost the future you thought you were going to have.

2. Inertia

It can be easy to stay stuck in a rut, especially if your marriage woes have caused you to sink into an actual depression.

It may be time to get counseling to help organize your thoughts and feelings and find that inner spark that will help you move forward.

3. Social pressure

Divorce will shake up your world. You may be feeling pressure from your family not to be a "failure" when it comes to marriage. There may be religious pressure if you belong to a religion that frowns on divorce. Your social circle may divide if you get divorced because many people don't know how to handle it when a friend divorces.

Again, these are all problems that you may have to face, so counseling can help you decide whether living your life with certain unhappiness is better than living with the result of a divorce. There's no right answer for everyone.

If you do decide that it's finally time for action, talk to a divorce attorney in Honolulu as soon as possible. That's the best way to protect your rights and your future.

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